Ersatz Relationship Blues

Funny thing how people think they are in a relationship, just because someone professes love to them. As in most endeavors, actions speak louder that words, and this man was being treated like a tool.

I am alot confused and was wonder what you all think.

A little back ground info: I was up to recently involved in a long distance relationship with a women that lives on the other coast. She is bright,beautiful, loving and caring or at least I thought so. She owns her own home and has two teenage boy's. We have been involved for 3+ years and I had planned to move to be with her to alleviate the stress of the two boy's switching schools and enviorment and she really likes it there and has some family she is close to. I was ready to sell my 3 bedroom home, walk away from a $65,000 a year job and move away from friends, family and loved ones not to mention the only place I have called home my whole life San Diego just to be with her.

Now I had put off the move several times, twice for work related issues. I have worked for the same company for over 20 years and the owner has always been really good to me so when they asked for me to stay a little longer I decided to try and do right by them seeing they had always done right by me. The last delay in moving was to help my 83 year old mother move from the house my father (who has passed away) accually built and into something a bit smaller and I was only asking for 1 or 2 months to make this happen. I do have a brother and sister who are local and can help but I felt the need to stay and help my mother through this time in her life since she has always been there for me.

Now when I aproached this women with my plan to stay and help my mother. Her response was either I was in the truck on the way to her or it was over. I decided to stay and help my mother and now the women won't speak to me and I guess our relationship is over but I really don't know because she won't talk to me. I guess what I am asking is did I really do something all that wrong or is she just being selfish. I have tried to call her, e-mail her and even sent a letter to her asking her to please explain why she chose to take such a harsh stance. I have not seen or heard any response from her and it is going on over a month. I really love this women and believed that we would have been happy together but now I am wondering if she wasn't playing some kind of game with me or if she really did love me as she professed.

Any input from you all would go a long way in helping me make sence of all this. I would appreciate you keep your coments clean and to the point, I don't need stupid response that make no sense as I am confused enough.

Thanks for you input

I pointed out the obvious to this poor sap.

The relationship is over, because you were not willing to put aside your needs or responsibilities to be at her beck and call. You do not have a "relationship" with someone as immature as she. What you have is a barrage of whining and demands that wear you down over the years to the status of a beaten dog. You are better off rid of that one, to make room for someone who respects you.