My husband and I haven't even been married a year, and we barely have sex anymore.. not by my choice believe me. I wish we were having sex at least once a day, but I am lucky if I get it once a week. it seems like he would rather look at porn than have sex with me. But when I say anything about it and how it hurts me, he says that it makes him feel like crap and he doesn't want to have sex with me when I bring up the fact that we don't have as much sex as I would like. He looks at it any moment he gets it seems.. It is soo gross..and such a turn off for me. I asked him to stop because it makes me feel like I am unattractive to him... I get rejected when I try to start sex... I have tried a lot, but nothing seems to work. Now lately, I have noticed that when he looks at porn, he will come to me to "gett off real quick" which seems so selfish. He says if I want to get off that I better hurry... how romantic.
What do I do? If I confront him about it, he gets defensive.. He says that I have put on weight, and that is why he is not so attracted to me. Yet I gained weight from quitting smoking and eating more which he asked me to do! I was too skinny before and now I am too fat!?I am tired of his excuses, but I am not going to go to the "D" word. what do I do?!
The first year of marriage is usually the best one, when it comes to sex. After that, the novelty wears off and it can become routine, and even boring. Many women use sex as a sort of loss leader to snare a man, and once the deal is completed they cut it way back in an evil sort of bait and switch. Many men lose interest in sex if you put on weight or otherwise change your appearance so that you are a lot different that what he found attractive enough to marry. Whether you are too fat or too skinny, this guy likes to live the fantasy and does not want to interact with a real live woman. You have lost him and you will not get him back. If you do not want to do the "D" word, then dig in for a long life of celibacy or furtive sexual affairs. In my view, you should have kept up with the smoking to stay thin. It works for me, along with the diet pills and starving myself.
If you really want to get his interest, look at the women that gets him excited and he rubs them out for. Then get boobs like that, hair dye and whatever else it takes to put some lead in his pencil. Prepare to change your appearance from time to time as his interests change.
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